"Irregular Heart Beats" - Psalm 51:1-17 – March 5, 2003

A few weeks ago surgeons in North Carolina transplanted a new heart in a young teenage girl. The transplant was successful but there were complications. It seems the blood type of the new heart did not match and the girl’s body rejected it. They transplanted a second heart but unfortunately the girl’s brain was damaged and she died a few days later.

It was a tragic end to what could have been a wonderful story. Had the blood type matched the little girl would most likely be living. But somewhere in the process of acquiring a new heart there was serious human error. Heart transplants are an amazing phenomenon when they are successful. But, when they don’t the outcome can be very tragic.

When the psalmist said, "Create in me a clean heart," he wasn’t talking about a heart transplant. He was asking God to forgive him for his mistakes. Our psalmist is David. David’s heart had become filled with selfishness and cruelty. First, he took advantage of Bethsheba. Then he had her husband, a soldier, sent to the front of battle where he was ultimately killed. David was confronted with his sins by Nathan since David’s heart had become very hard.

This psalm is David’s confession. He prays to God for the power never to sin again. He believes that God will give him a new heart so he can experience the joy of a new life, one that is reconciled with God. God is about re-creation. God is about restoring our souls and giving us a new spirit. God knows that the condition of our hearts determines the quality of life we will experience and the fulfillment we will realize. A cold, hard heart keeps us separate from God. It causes us to live in darkness and sin. On the other hand, a warm, loving heart means we are living as God intended.

Part of what it means to be human is to be sinful. We may try hard to perfect but we all make mistakes. David made mistakes. A mistake was made in selecting the right heart for the little girl. This is why we need God to forgive us and make our hearts clean since human error affects the lives of others and also destroys our own.

Currently, NASA is trying to determine what went wrong with the space shuttle, Columbia. Seven lives were lost and the accident has resulted in a complete review of every single procedure, every piece of equipment and every communication. Someone will probably be blamed for being careless. There is the potential for law suits, the firing of employees or perhaps even punitive action. So far, no one has come forward and said, "I’m sorry, I made a grave mistake."

Like David, we first must be willing to admit that we have failed. That is not a simple task since no one likes to confess his/her shortcomings. Confession is scary. We are afraid that we will no longer be loved or accepted. We are worried about our reputations. We don’t want others to know we are vulnerable and subject to failure and mistakes like everyone else. Perhaps pride inhibits our ability to share our mistakes, or perhaps we actually believe we are without sin. Worse yet, maybe we don’t truly believe in a God who forgives us. Confession is what leads to forgiveness, and ultimately peace and wholeness. David threw himself on the mercy of God, confessing his sins and therefore experienced a healing of his heart. "Have mercy on me, O God, according to they steadfast love…For I know my transgressions, and my sin is every before me," David proclaimed.

We can’t expect God to create in us a clean heart until we are willing to ask for forgiveness. At some point we have to come clean and be willing to say to God we need God’s forgiveness. Notice that David makes no excuse. He doesn’t try to rationalize his behavior. He says, "I have sinned and I am ready to be cleansed."

We in the protestant church do not practice going to confession. I heard the other day about a priest at Lehman Catholic High School who was asked a question from a student. The student asked, "Father, do you go to confession?" The priest acknowledged that he did. "What do you confess? The student asked. The priest replied, "That I talk too long."

What would you confess if someone asked you? Would you tell the truth? Would you blame someone else? Or, are do you have the courage to say to God, "I too, have sinned."

Once we have admitted our mistakes we have to take responsibility for our actions. In this Psalm, David, has taken ownership of his wrongful behavior and consequently has experienced the forgiveness of God. As a response to his new found freedom and clean heart he has promised to do three things. First, he has promised to teach and encourage others to confess their sins as well. Second, he has promised to be a messenger, to tell his story and to tell of the mercy of God. And third, he has promised to be fully dependent on God in the future.

To ask God to create in us a clean heart means, like it did for David, that our lives result in new behavior. David resolved to be fully dependent on God in the future. "Restore to me the joy of they salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit." Just what did he mean by a willing spirit?

As many of you know I workout at the "Y" three times a week. My workout concludes with a one-mile run on the indoor track. A few weeks ago I was running my mile but I was tired. I thought to myself, "Why am I doing this?" I was gasping for air and I could feel pain all through my body. I thought, "Perhaps I should just quit. Besides, who would know?"

I then realized that God would know. God knows everything, especially when our hearts are not clean. God also knows when the spirit is unwilling. I continued on, knowing the condition of my cardiovascular system (including my heart) would benefit from the exercise. At the end of my run like every time before I would be tired but I would feel better. I would also be in better physical condition.

The willingness to confess our limitations requires personal sacrifice. As David said in the psalm, ""The sacrifice acceptable to god is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heat, O God, thou wilt not despise."

We think of a broken spirit as something negative. The psalm proclaims a broken spirit is a positive thing. Instead of thinking of it as being weaker, it is what actually makes us stronger. The willingness to confess, to admit our mistakes and yield to the forgiveness of God takes courage. It requires a dependence on God rather than trying to go it alone.

Lent is the season of the Church when we acknowledge our dependency on God and practice self-denial. It also presents us with the opportunity to recondition our hearts. It means living with humility yet staying in the race. It also means opening our selves to the forgiveness of God who is just waiting to lead our lives in a new direction.

Dr. Keith Wagner, St. Paul’s United Church of Christ, Sidney, Ohio