"Never Alone" - John 14:15-21 - May 5, 2002

A few months ago, one of my colleagues relocated to southern Indiana. We have been friends for over 11 years. Every week we would have breakfast together and during those gatherings we would compare notes about our ministries. When he left I felt like he was abandoning me. I have to admit that for awhile I was angry at him for leaving. I really miss the camaraderie.

I am sure you have had times in your lives when a good friend or loved one moved away or even died. Your life suddenly has a void and you therefore feel a sense of loneliness. You wonder how you can survive without that close friend who is no longer around. It simply doesn’t seem possible that someone else could take their place.

This is what the disciples were experiencing as Jesus was about to leave them. They were bewildered, feeling deserted and alone. Peter, Thomas, Philip and the others all wondered where Jesus was going. Undoubtedly they were feeling a great sense of loss and abandonment.

Friendships built on unconditional love are unique. The kind of closeness that you feel with others who care about you and share your passions are rare. Jesus and his disciples had formed a special bond, a friendship that transcended all others. They had shared a variety of experiences together, witnessing healings, seeing lives turned around and learning lessons that would lead them through life. With Jesus they felt assured, confident of their mission. Their fellowship carried them through stormy seas, rugged terrain, confrontations with the Pharisees and encounters with skeptics who disbelieved in their mission. But, through it all they stayed together, loved one another, as Jesus commanded.

When we have friends who love us we feel invincible, confident to proceed and we have the strength to endure. But when they leave us, "aloneness" sets in. Without the essential support and love of friends our countenance is diminished.

Jesus told his disciples that he would never leave them alone. "I will not leave you desolate," he said. He then went on to say there would be a "counselor," an advocate, someone who would walk with them and look out for them in the future.

God walks with us in several ways; with people, with nature and even animals. Let me tell you about my friend Jake. Jake was a golden retriever. He was unruly, disobedient and destructive. When Lin and I married 15 years ago we were a blended family. We had 6 children between us. Most everyone referred to us as the "Brady Bunch." It wasn’t easy for the kids to instantly relate to each other. Jake, however loved everyone and all the kids loved Jake. He loved everyone unconditionally. He was the catalyst of the family, who, in spite of his bad behavior, helped to bring us closer together. With Jake, we were never alone.

Since I have moved so many times in my life it has been difficult for me to maintain long-lasting friendships. But as I reflect on my past I am keenly aware that God has always managed to provide me with at least one close personal friend. My most recent friend is gone but I am confident another will take his place. That’s the way it works, just as God has promised.

Friendship, however does not materialize without some accountability. Jesus promises us we will never be alone, but he brackets that promise with the phrase, "keep my commandments." Specifically he is referring to the love of God and love of neighbor. Our loyalty to God is juxtaposed with love for others. In other words, God expects us to reach out.

When people are lonely they tend to compound that loneliness by withdrawing from society. Filled with self-pity, they isolate themselves from contact with people. By failing to reach out they create barriers which prevents them from making friends. We tend to forget that friendships are born because one person took a risk and reached out to another.

At my last church my wife and I included a colleague in our family gatherings. He was a bachelor and we had several teenagers at the time. He would come for birthday celebrations and holiday cookouts. We became close friends and since that particular church was in a transition, it was helpful to have someone who was there to walk through those changing circumstances with me. In October, 1989, there was a huge snow storm in Southwest Ohio. Large amounts of ice formed on power lines and we were without power for three days. We farmed out the children to the homes of their friends and our bachelor friend invited us to stay with him until our power was restored. In a time of great need he was a true friend.

God’s unconditional love is the bonding agent that makes friendship a reality. When we are willing to extend ourselves to others on the pathways of life we can be assured that God will never leave us alone.

Mary Kinsolving tells the story of living in Manhattan. As a child, her mother walked her to school four blocks away every morning and then walked home with her again in the afternoon. One hard winter her mother came down with pneumonia and Mary had to go to school and return home by herself. She states that on the way home the second day she fell on some ice while crossing the street, and at that moment a car skidded toward her and came within inches of her before it stopped. "The driver helped me up," she said, "and I managed to get home but didn’t tell my mother because I didn’t want her to worry."

The next morning the streets were even icier and when she came to her first cross street she was terrified and stated that she stood at the intersection for a long time. Finally, an elderly woman came over to her and said, "I don’t see very well. May I hold your hand when I cross the street?" She replied, "Oh, yes," and the elderly lady took her hand and "Before long we were on the other side." Then Mary Kinsolving walked a short distance and looked back to see how the woman was doing. To her surprise, "She was crossing the street we had just crossed together and was walking by herself much faster than we had before." Ms. Kinsolving then realized that the lady had only pretended poor eyesight to help her across the street. Much later in life she understood she could overcome her fear of being alone by helping someone else. (Catholic Digest, Mary Kinsolving)

Those of you who are introverts are probably saying to yourself, "But I am shy and find it difficult to reach out to people I don’t know." You may be shy, but you are not void of the ability to open yourselves to others. You have within you the power of unconditional love. Notice that Jesus also said, "I will give you the Spirit of truth...and you know him for he dwells within you."

The Spirit of God is within us. It is not something we have to earn, or purchase or acquire. It is a power within that is just waiting to be released. God’s Holy Spirit is available to us for whatever abandonment we may feel.

"Keep my commandments." Jesus’ words to love God with all our hearts just keep popping up. Could it be there is a direct connection between being passionate about our love for God and the power of God’s Spirit?

About 20 years ago I was sitting at a church meeting with the trustees. This particular church didn’t have a lot of resources. It was during the spring of that year and they were lamenting about the problems of the roof which was leaking over the fellowship hall. It was a historic problem which kept coming back again and again. They were feeling very alone and hopeless. The problem seemed impossible to resolve. While I was listening I began to sketch a crude drawing of the church with a gabled roof. At one point I showed it to one of the men seated next to me. I said, "Do you suppose this will work?" They suddenly got excited about the possibility of replacing the flat roof on the church fellowship hall with a gabled one. After 120 days they had raised the money, completed the construction and dedicated the newly remodeled building. How God’s spirit can work in the life of the church never ceases to amaze me.

"When the day of Pentecost had come, they were all together in one place. And suddenly a sound came from heaven like the rush of a mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting." (Acts 2:1-2) When folks are passionate about their faith and care about one another, God’s Spirit really works. That particular church overcame a huge obstacle because of their willingness to unleash God’s Spirit.

There are a variety of circumstances which causes us to feel alone. When our friends move away we feel abandoned and all by ourselves. When illness strikes or a crisis occurs we feel rejected by God and that no one cares. When the new replaces the old we feel a sense of loss and sadness, longing for those feelings of togetherness. When we have a vision for the good of our community but others don’t share it, we feel like the only person in the world. Nevertheless, the Spirit of truth is within us, just waiting to be born.

"I will not leave you desolate." That is God’s promise. God’ is present with us even in our darkest moments. Anthony deMello,S.J., tells this story about a man alone in the desert. A traveler lost in the desert despaired of ever finding water. He struggled up one hilltop then another and another in the hope of sighting a stream somewhere. He kept looking in every direction with no success. As he staggered onward, his foot caught on a dry bush and he stumbled to the ground. That’s where he lay, with no energy even to rise, no desire to struggle anymore, no hope of surviving this ordeal.

As he lay there, helpless and dejected, he suddenly became aware of the silence of the desert. On all sides a majestic stillness reigned, undisturbed by the slightest sound., Suddenly he raised his head. He had heard something. Something so faint that only the sharpest ear and the deepest silence would lead to its detection; the sound of running water. Heartened by the hope that the sound aroused in him, he rose and kept moving till he arrived at a stream of fresh, cool water. (The Heart of the Enlightened, Anthony deMello)

We are never alone. God’s Spirit is always with us. There will always be friends to walk with us wherever our life takes us. Yet, God wants us to reach out and be willing to include strangers in our lives. Sometimes God’s Spirit moves us because of our faith and passion for God. The Spirit of God is always there, waiting for us. Sometimes we have to be totally alone to know it.

Dr. Keith Wagner, St. Paul’s United Church of Christ, Sidney, Ohio