"A Time to be Silent" - Mark 1:21-28 - January 29, 2005

The third chapter of Ecclesiates is one of my all time favorite scriptures. It reads, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die," and so on. When you get to the 7th verse it reads, "there is a time to be silent and a time to speak."

When I was a young boy I liked to talk with my friends in class. The teacher would frequently catch me and then make me sit in the hall where I couldn’t interrupt the class. It was embarrassing for me but after awhile it became kind of a game. No one was in the hall but me so I often wandered around. It was more fun than sitting in a classroom.

Although I was a fairly good student I eventually learned that my times in the hall caused me to miss out on some lessons. After awhile I got tired of asking my friends to bring me up to date. It wasn’t easy for me, but I had to learn to keep my mouth shut in order to learn.

Since I am a public speaker I cherish the fact that people are listening to my messages. You can sense when folks are tuned in because it becomes strangely quiet. I can now appreciate why my teachers wanted me to keep quiet in class. Perhaps that is why the words, "there is a time to be silent and a time to speak" have become so meaningful to me.

The words in Ecclesiastes were written for the ancient Hebrews. The time for silence most likely came from the ancient custom of being quiet during the time of mourning. Silence was required during the time of bereavement. Ben Sira said, "The wise remain silent until the right moment."

There was an article in the Dayton Daily News on Tuesday, January 24th, about a Baptist congregation in Kansas who are protesting during the funerals of American Soldiers. They are using those moments, where there is a captive audience, to announce that God is punishing America because of its tolerance of homosexuality. They have a right to speak out, but to use a time when others are listening is offensive. Currently there is a bill in that state to keep protesters from getting too close to funeral proceedings. Unfortunately, the radical group is using "a time to keep silent" as a time to speak.

Granted this is bazaar behavior and unfortunate that people would use sacred time for some political agenda. On the other hand it illustrates that indeed, there are times when "silence" is necessary.

This was the case with the man with the unclean spirit. Ironically, Jesus was in the temple on the sabbath, a sacred time, and the man interrupted his teaching. He cried out, "What have you to do with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are, the Holy one of God." In response to the man’s protest, Jesus tells him to be silent. Consequently the unclean spirit came out of him.

Jesus’ anecdote for the man’s unclean spirit was to keep quiet and listen. He wasn’t listening because he was filled with himself. He was possessed with is own ego. Whenever we are focused solely on our own personal agendas we are not in touch with our surroundings. Thus, our hearing is impaired.

Like other men I wife tells me there are times when I don’t listen. Those are the times when I am fixated on some sporting event or some problem. When that happens I tune out sounds or voices that don’t resonate with the object that is receiving my attention. Its not that we men don’t want to listen to our wives, its that we are too focused, if not obsessed with something else.

In today’s world we have unclean spirits which can only be overcome with our willingness to be silent and listen. Some of those spirits are greed, fearfulness, arrogance or hopelessness. If we are afraid we are possessed with the need to feel secure. If we are arrogant we are possessed with our own ego. If we are hopeless, we are possessed with a lack of faith. When we are too consumed with our personal agendas and unable to hear, we are no different than the man with the unclean spirit.

One time a city man, turned farmer, was showing a young boy over his acreage. The man bragged incessantly about his accomplishments. He told him how he started from scratch and worked his way up through the business world. He told him how he had earned a lot of money, enough to purchase the land and transform it into a productive farm. He told him about all the great yields of his crops. Finally he pointed to a stack of hay, a full granary and boxes of produce. He declared, "And I grew this all myself, sonny. I started with nothing, now look at it," he boasted. "From nothing?" the young boy asked. "That’s right, from nothing," the man answered. "Wow," the young boy said as he reflected on all the man had shared with him. "My dad farms too, but he needs seeds to grow his crops."

Are you listening?

When I ask my students in my counseling class what they believe is the best trait of a good counselor they usually say, "giving advice." But, as they will learn in the course, giving advice is not what counseling is about. Counseling is about listening, having empathy and empowering a client to work out their problem for themselves. Listening requires patience, trust and paying attention, not giving advice.

Ida and David wanted their sons to graduate from college. Their boys would have to pay their own way since they didn’t have enough income to support them. They encouraged their sons to achieve all they could. Arthur graduated from high school and got a job. Edgar began studying law. Dwight didn’t have a goal so he made a pack with Edgar. He would work two years and help put him through college, then Edgar would return the favor. Eventually, Dwight found an opportunity and enrolled in West Point. His parents were crushed by his decision. His mother, Ida, believed that being a soldier was evil. But, all she ever said was, "It’s your choice." David, his father remained silent, allowing his son the freedom to forge his own future. His parents wisely held their tongues. But on the day their son, Dwight Eisenhower, graduated they applauded. They applauded again when General Dwight Eisenhower became president of the United States.

Refraining from giving advice may be the best gift we can give our children. Silence may in fact be the greatest parental tool we have at our disposal. Are you listening?

In my very first sermon I used the expression, "If God wanted us to speak more than we are to listen, God would have created us with two mouths and only one ear." Following the worship service I was standing in the back of the church greeting those who had come that day for worship. A woman said to me, "I am visiting here today and I really enjoyed your message. Please don’t leave because I have something for you." She came back about five minutes later after going to her car. She handed me a beautiful wooden plaque with the following words engraved upon it: "If God wanted us to speak more than we are to listen, God would have created us with two mouths and only one ear." Are you listening?

I watched the movie, "Rudy", with Sean Astin, this past week, which is one of my all time favorites. It’s about the story of a young man who pursued his dream of playing football for Notre Dame. I never realized that that the real climax of the movie was right after Rudy quit the team. It was right after he found out he was not going to dress for the last game of his senior year. His friend on the maintenance crew at the stadium told him "to listen" and not walk away from his dream. Rudy heard him and went to practice with the team. His teammates were so moved by his determination they convinced the coach, Dan Divine, to let Rudy dress for the last game. He did and with the support of the team, coaches and fans, Rudy got to play the last two plays of the game. He was carried off the field by his teammates, something that has not happened to any player in the last thirty years.

To overcome the unclean spirits of a greed, fear and hopelessness we have to keep silent. Our lives will be enhanced when we put aside our personal agendas and listen to the voice of God. There will be times in life, like when raising our children that we need to hold back and say nothing. Listening can pave the way for wholeness and fulfillment. Listening can free us of those unclean spirits that possess us. "There is a time to speak and a time to listen."

Dr. Keith Wagner, St. Paul’s United Church of Christ, Sidney, Ohio